Life Story
Social Worker, Man Served Humanity, A Memorable Personality
& I believe that God prepared me for my present service of God in people, through different ways.&
& Firstly, even as a Schoolboy I had a desire to study more about how the mind works.&
& I remember acquiring a book on Hypnotism when I was only 14 years or so. &
I was fond of reading books. My books brought me in touch with great contemplative writers like Thomas Merton. I became interested in Contemplation and desired very much to be engaged in Meditation. My interest took me to the Founder of the Rosarians at Tholagatti. My Contact with him was an unforgettable one.
Around the age of 14 years or so, I met the Legion of Mary which gave me a whole new philosophy and new meaning to my life. Through the Legion God taught me things that perhaps no one else has taught. Within a week of my joining the Legion as a junior, I found myself standing by the bedside of a patient in a hospital, listening to him pouring out his heart, telling me of his loneliness, helplessness and insecurity. Until then I never knew that a schoolboy like me could do anything worthwhile for an adult by way of help. The Legion was giving me regular weekly listen to them. I began to find God in them as I had never done before. I began to learn the power of listening to Christ in people as I had never done before. I began to learn the power of listening to Christ in people as I had never done before. This was a big change in my life. It was perhaps one big way in which God was preparing me for my present work.
In the Legion I learnt the value and importance of relationships, how relationships could bring about healing, and how to respect people, how never to despair and give up, how to adopt a positive attitude to seeming failure and a host of other things which have stood in good stead for my service as a counsellor today.
My first exposure to conunselling proper, was under the great master Fr. Tony De Mello SJ. I followed two other longer courses later. By that time I had taken to Counselling like a fish to water. I realized that this was what God expects me to be fully involved in. Therefore I left my service in the Government and took to Cunselling, Counsellor- training and Family Life education on a full – time basis.
Now, as I get about my work as a Counsellor helping people to grow, discovering their latent potential, the reasons for their problems, and the steps they wish to take, I find that I am given an opportunity of being an instrument in the Healing giving me also an opportunity to grow. God is so much at work with my growth and the growth of my client, that I begin to think “Who is receiving more help my client or me?”
I am also wonder – Struck at the depth of love that God has for His people. On numerous occasions, God has allowed me to plan various activities, then frustrated me, and shown me what His plan is. He loves His people so much, if He wishes to help a person with counseling, He would arrange even a breakdown of some facility such as a Lift or a Vehicle, so that the person in distress surely meets me. God plans very specifically, even down to the last detail. Reflecting on His ways of planning and execution is an ongoing training program for any counsellor.
In calling me to be a Counsellor – Trainer, God has again given me a great opportunity of growing and helping my trainees to grow into Helpful persons. In these six-month courses, God reminds me all over again, that we are born to be winners. Helping people to realize this fact, is one of the best helps one could ever give. As I discuss human behavior and counseling with my trainees, I statically, these courses of Counsellor- Training do not show every participant becoming competent in counseling. But the work of training is more than rewarding . I see God at work with all those who enroll, irrespective of their gaining competence in counseling.
There is another aspect of these training sessions which I see clearly. I receive opportunities for coming into contact with people and leaders of other ethnic and religious groups. All of them shed any prejudices they may have had for people who do not member of the human spece is as a brother or sister. Enabling this disposition in people, makes me happy.
Marriage and Family Life Education programs bring me great satisfaction as I see the obvious joy in most participants, be they youth doing Live Education programs, Engaged couples doing preparation – for – Marriage programs, or married persons going through Marriage Enrichment and Parent – Education programs. They are so happy to become knowledgeable about these various aspects of Family Life applicable to them. They are invited to cooperate with their new – found knowledge . If they do, we could expect the world to be at least a little better than what it is now. If these programs had a chance of spreading to all nooks and corners of our country, we would then have even a still better world to live in.
I enjoy me calling as a Counselor,Trainer and Family Life Educator. I perceive it as God’s own plan for me. I am aware of the need for improving and renewing my knowledge and practice. I also see the need to make it relevant to the changing conditions of life on this planet, but without compromising what I hold to be values associated with God’s plan for His people.
The body will perish but your name will not”. Each time I hear these lyrics of a popular Sinhala song I am reminded of the late Mr. Godwin Mendis who made a definite impact on my life. He was my teacher, my friend and my counselor. My close association with him was an input to overcoming my own shortcomings in life. This is not an individually biased point of view but shared by hundreds of others who have followed his lectures and seminars over the years.
Parents, children, young adults, teachers, university students, public servants and the clergy have immensely benefited by his expertise.
It is not only his knowledge and skills but also his personality that has added value to his achievements. His attire, his speech, his attire and his angle of vision has had a definite impact on many people’s lives. His expression and emotions were never over done but moderately presented. Observers have noted his mastering of “listening skills” undoubtedly attentive to people from all walks of life at different levels. People travelled and flocked to listen to him and yearned for his expert services. Mr. Mendis’ planning and organizing ability was clearly demonstrated by observing his life style and how he conducted sessions to achieve varied objectives.
His knowledge, skills and experience blended with learning. Empathetic and individualistic characteristics generated a sort of magnetic field which attracted many to call for his services. Mr. Godwin Mendis offered his valued services to the depressed, potential suicide victims, disarranged families and victims of unfortunate circumstances.
I am reminded of an incident where an individual listening to him from outside the lecture hall sought permission to speak with him. This is what he had to say. “I had made a firm decision to commit suicide but changed my decision after listening to Mr. Mendis. Now I have a purpose in life”. He noted many times how his life was enriched by his association with The Legion of Mary. I recall an incident which he quoted, that changed his outlook of life. “I was involved with the legion of Mary since the inception. One of my first tasks was to visit the patients in hospital. Seeing them there was an in explainable conflicting change within me. I experienced a new meaning and purpose to life. In many sessions he focused on the importance of our faith in Lord of Jesus Christ, its relevance to counseling and its spiritual impact. “Lord Jesus takes precedence over all these technicalities” he said.
Mr. Godwin Mendis did not lead an easy life. Among other concerns and challenges he was heavily burdened with a serious illness but no obstacle could resist the pathway to achieving his objective of serving the needy.
St. Francis Assisi was tilling the ground in his monastery when an on looker walked up to him and asked, “what would you do if you knew you could be dead before sundown?”
He answered promptly; I will finish tilling the ground before I die”. If anyone would have asked the late Mr. Mendis the same, I have no doubt he would have answered the same way.
Born on 17th November 1928, he was a great son of this earth. He was called to rest on 7th March 19999 which I consider the most unfortunate and the saddest day of my life, in fact not only for me, but for our whole family. His 10th death Anniversary falls on 7th March 2009.
We lost him 10 years ago at the age of 70, as he was suffering from an enlarged heart after surviving three heart attacks within the twenty five years to that date.
Dad was a a loving and caring father to seven of us, two boys and five girls, and a faithful and responsible husband to our mother who always depended totally on him for everything. As a person who strongly believed and had a great faith in God, Dad guided us spiritually from our small days, not by advice but by example. He showed us that nothing can be done without God’s blessings, as well as that nothing will go wrong if we have faith in God Almighty. He was a true believer and tried his very best to do everything possible according to God’s plan and wish.
Other than fulfilling his responsibilities, duties and obligations to our family, dad’s next wish and will was to always help others. Dad used to say that he got his initial formation to help others when he joined the Legion of Mary as a junior member at De Mazanod College. Soon after school, he had started the Legion of Mary in Nagoda, Kandana Parish and became a very active Legionary. After holding many positions at parish, regional and district levels, he was at the helm of the national body within a short span. He became the National President (Senatus of Sri Lanka) at a very young age and held this position for three terms, unanimously elected by the members. Among the manyprojects implemented projects he embarked on. One is the founding of “Maw Sevena”, a home for the destitute children started in Mattakuliya, Colombo 15, which had been one of his childhood dreams. It was heartening to mention that “Maw Sevena” celebrated its 25th anniversary just a few months after dad passed away. The second project was a setting up a model housing village in a very poor area in Ragama, called Magulpokuna. There lived the poorest of the poor, who did not even have the basic facilities such as proper shelter, water, sanitation and electricity. Dad managed to get the support of many quarters and finally completed the village with 144 new houses with all basic facilities, a junior school and a health centre. Incidentally this was the first model village set up in the country.
After hearing and seeing the work done by dad through the Legion of Mary, he was invited by Rev. Fr. Mervyn Fernando to join his institute. At the ager of 43, dad prematurely retired from Govt. service and joined Family Studies and Services Institute (FSSI) in 1978, where he was the Executive Director until his death. Dad was a counselor, counselor trainer, youth educator and parental educator. In addition, he used to conduct training programs in human relations, communication, leadership, psychology, marriage, etc. His knowledge and experience in this field was not only needed in Sri Lanka but overseas as well. Just as he travelled all over the country and worked with hundreds of different conferences, seminars, workshops and to conduct training programes. Some were UN sponsored projects. During this renure, dad worked with so many Government organizations and conducted many training programs such as, for Police Dept., Prisons Dept., Child Probation Dept., Justice Ministry, Education Dept., etc. Other organizations were, Alcoholics Anonymous, National Dangerous Drugs Control Board and NGO’s such as UN, Save the Children, Sumitrayo, Sarvodaya, Forut and social clubs like Rotary Club, Lions Club, Zonta, etc. Religious Organizations of Catholic, Christian, Buddhist, Muslim and Hindu faiths were regular partners which availed his valuable services.
There was one common thing said about dad by all who came to pay their last respects to him when he died. They all said that dad was definitely a one-in-a million to be born in this country, with such a sense of love for people, and commitment and dedication to make others happy. That is very true, not merely because he is my father, but because he was really chosen by God to serve his people in his name. May God him eternal rest!.
On the 10th death anniversary of the late Mr. Godwin Mendis, Maw Sevena, the Legion of Mary’s Home for Destitute Boys moves to pay a tribute to him for the great contribution he made to the Legion of Mary, a unique Lay Apostolate system in the service of the Catholic Church all over the world, for the leadership he gave the Legion in Sri Lanka as its Head and particularly in setting out on its mission to build a Home for Destitute Boys in Colombo in 1974. This was the first time the worldwide Legion system attempted to build a home of this type anywhere in the world.
Along with the writer as his first and main assistant, Godwin did not spare himself in setting out to meet the challenges before him, and worked hard in putting together his plan to build Maw Sevena – as the Home is now called, meaning “under the shadow of the Mother” - and in this case, under MARY, Great Mother of the Church, the Queen of the Legion, under whose patronage the Legion seeks to work in its lay apostolic Endeavour in the mission of the Church. In fact, it has worked in this devoted way for over 75 years under the great Legionary service provided by its Founder, the late Frank Duff, whose Cause for Canonization is now being taken up, in recognition of the inspired unique Legion system he presented to the Church.
Way back in 1974 on 15th August, the Feast of Mary’s Assumption into Heaven, the Feast of Mary’s Assumption into Heaven, the then Spiritual Director of the Legion of marry, the late Very Rev. Fr. Ignatius Gamlath, in the presence of a large gathering of Legionaries, cut the first sod for the set ting up of MAW SEVENA. This was on land in Mattakkuliya gifted to the Church by the late Mr. & Mrs. D.M.J. Correa, and given by the late Cardinal Cooray to the Legion of Mary for the building of MAW SEVENA. Godwin and the writer then set out on their plan to build Maw Sevana for its work under the Legion system and the lay expertise needed for the building up and sustaining of the home. The first buildings, all planned by Godwin, himself a very skilled draughtsman in the Telecommunication Dept., consisted of two cottages to hold ten boys under a lady matron, to provide the motherly care they needed, and also a dining room and refectory. On 8th December 1974, the Glorious Feast of Mary’s Immaculate Conception, Maw Sevana Opened its doors to two little boys. Since then, another cottage to provide for 10 more boys and an equipped study room have now been built to cater to the needs of the boys. dining room and refectory. On 8th December 1974,
Maw Sevana has today virtually stood the test of time and has been functioning for over 34 years as the Legion of Mary’s for Destitute boys in Sri Lanka. It has had its fair Share of the many problems they have been confronted with, and with Our Lady’s never failing assistance and direction, Maw Sevana has survived. Undertakes the entire work of looking after the daily needs of the boys in its care. For over 1750 weeks the, legionaries at Maw Sevana under the title of Our Lady Comforter of the Afflicted, have met without any let-up under the Legion’s pre scribed Spirituality, seeking to see and serve Christ through his Mother Mary in the boys handed to its care. Whilst the day to day work of MAW SEVANA is being looked after by the presidium, another Legion body consisting of 10 members, from various Legion Councils in the Island, has been undertaking the work in providing for all the finances bodies work in close union in helping MAW SEVANA to carry on its task to attempt to reach out to the boys handed to its care and help them with a greater hope for their future.
And now, on the 10 Death Anniversary of Godwin Mendis, the legion of Mary in Sri Lanka and MAW SEVANA acknowledge their debt of gratitude to him, the Founder, and pay a tribute to him for his pioneering work.
Mr. Godwin Mendis of Nagoda passed away in March 1999. Another good and humble soul lay in the personality of Mr. Godwin Mendis of Nagoda.
I knew him for well-nigh forty five years, from my student days and later on in life when I did church work having joined the Legion of Mary. On very many occasions I had invited him to preside at Legion of Mary functions and address the members; he of course very willingly agreed and acceded to my requests. This was the caliber and fabric of his good nature. In any tempest or storm he would remain calm and unruffled. All throughout life goodness was personified in him in full measure.
He was an intellectual giant in the field of family problems and woes, and had found adequate solace too many thousands who had to encounter these storms in their families. All those who went to him at the Paul VI Centre for advice and guidance will now miss him for all time. I am really sorry I could not attend his last rites at Nagoda as I was ill.
May the good and merciful Lord Jesus grant his soul perfect peace and eternal rest.
We have just buried one of the great and most respected Lay Leaders of the Sri Lankan Catholic Church. As a person who has closely associated with him and also nourished by him in the Legionary life I wish to say a few words about him.
First and foremost we thank God Almighty for the wonderful gift of his life and work. His name will go down in the Church History for his significant contribution to the Legion of Mary Movement and also the Family Movement. When he died he was the Executive Director of the Family Studies and Services Institute rendering a valuable service. It will be superfluous for me to speak about what he did in these Movements and the F.S.S.I. But one thing I must hold out and that is his sense of utter dedication and commitment he evinced in his Vocation. Firstly his Vocation as a married person to his family and secondly his Vocation in the Legion and the Family Movements. If we can emulate his sense of commitment in our Vocation, I think that is the greatest tribute we can pay to him.
I am sure, being a faithful servant of Our Blessed Mother, she would have accompanied him to her Divine Son and he would have received his Eternal Reward.
Let us pray for the Repose of his soul and also for his wife and seven children and their family members to accept this demise with registration to His Devine Will. May his soul rest in peace. The above is based on the funeral oration delivered by Mr. Tony Rodrigo at the burial grounds of the Nagoda Catholic Church just before the body was lowered to the burial.
M. - Magnanimous R. - Responsible. H. - Humility G. - God-fearing O. - Obedient D. - Devoted W. - Wholistic and Wise I. - Innocent N. - Nobel M. - Meritorious E. - Eminent N. - Neat D. - Dedicated I. - Inoffensive S. - Spontenous, Solicitous and Sentient He is Mr. H. Godwin Mendis. The above adjective are not enough to measure out and value the integral person of Mr. Godwin. He is really a valuable person to the church as well as to the Sri Lankan society. The exemplary life of Mr. Godwin Mendis could be a model to all the Christians of good will to do what they are entrusted to do for their fellow-men and women and as a whole for the whole people of God. Let us all pray: Eternal rest grnat unto our brother, friend Godwin’s soul, O Lord and let per-petual light shine upon him.
It came as rude shock to all of us present at this meeting. I offered prayer silently for the repose of his soul. He died in the early hours on Sunday while he was taken to the General Hospital, Colombo, succumbing to a heart attack.
On the same day, I was present in his home when the corpse was brought around 9.00 p.m. There was a large crowd waiting for this moment.
Thereafter several people including priest, religious sisters and brothers, lay people and Buddhist Monks came pouring into his home and paid their last respect.
He was undoubtedly one of the great and most respected lay leaders of the Catholic Church in Sri Lanka. His name will go down to history as one who made a significant contribution to the legion of Mary Movements in Sri Lanka.
At the time of his death he was working as the Executive Director of Family Studies and Services Institute which Institute he served for over fifteen years. He was the National President of the Legion of Mary at one time and served for three years in this capacity. He was considered as a giant of this movement. He is called the local Duff (Mr. Frank Duff is the Founder of this Movement in Ireland). While working in the Legion he visited all the dioceses of Sri Lanka and met several people including bishop, priest, religious sisters and brothers who endeared him because of his zealous and dedicated work.
While working in the Family Studies and Services Institute he became an expert in counselling. He developed a marvellous ear for listening to various problems and woes of people and helped them to overcome them. He conducted Pre-Cana classes for couples, Parent Education Programmes and also Counselling Programmes.
His recognition was not limited to Sri Lanka. He has represented Sri Lanka in a number of International Conference in other parts of the worlds. He conducted a number of Counselling Programmes not only for the Catholic s and Christians but also for the non Christians including Buddhist Monks, doctors, nurses, jailors, school children and youth.
He was a product of the Christian brothers of St. John Baptist De La Salle. He worked in the Telecommunications Department as a draughtsman and finally became Drawing Office Assistant and retired at fifty five to join the Family Studies and Services Institute. He was a very talented person. He was a prolific writer, a polished public speaker and above all a man of great vision and apostolic action. He was an active participator in the National Pastoral Convention held in 1995. He addressed the Patricians on several occasions on a number of topics.
He played a very significant role at the Legion Officer’s Conference held at Ma-Eliya, Ja-Ela last year. In fact he presented his plan to steer the Legion of Mary to the third millennium. Recently he addressed the priests of the Kurunegala Diocese at the Ampitiya OSB Seminary on their final day of the Retreat on his Legionary life and experiences. This will help them to rethink their idea of the Legion.
Special mention must be made of the “Maw Sevana” Project at Msttakkuliya originated by him where a number of boys are being looked after educated and trained for their vocational career. This Institute will no doubt perpetuate his memory. His life was centered on the Holy Eucharist, which is the source, centre and summit of all Christian life and activity.
He was a man of prayer, meditation and contemplation. He discovered new ways of experiencing the Lord in Prayer and shared with others. His life was truly a model for Lay Catholics. He gave his life entirely to Our Blessed mother in order to belong to Jesus Christ.
What is admirable was his sense of utter dedication and commitment he evinced in the vocation – firstly his vocation as a married person in his family and then his vocation in the Legion of Mary and Family Movements. The greatest tribute we can pay to him is to emulate his sense of utter commitment to his vocation. I am sure being a faithful servant of Our Blessed Mother, She would have accompanied him to Her Divine Son and he would receive his eternal reward.
Let us pray for the repose of his soul and for his family – wife and seven children and their family members for the grace to accept the demise with resignation to the Divine Will.
May his soul rest in peace!
We were deeply moved by the sudden death of Godwin Mendis, a well – known psychotherapist and counselor who was committed fully to rehabilitate the mentally handicapped and the socially dispossessed people. The work done by Mr. Mendis is commendable and my humble words of appreciation will hardly be a suitable tribute to him! God was so bountiful as to give us. Mr. Godwin on November 17, 1928 and He called him to His eternal reward on March 7, 1999. His death is indeed an irreparable loss not only to the Church but also to the whole of Sri Lanka. Having served at the Postal Department, he joined the Institute of Family Studies and Services as Director at Paul the VI Centre Colombo to serve all categories of people dedicating himself in counselling and rehabilitation. He was privileged to attend the Vatican II Council representing the lay people as Lanka. His main vision was to serve the Church and God’s people irrespective of caste, creed and religion. He was humble, kind and understanding. The unconditional love and understanding shown by him in understanding the exact plight of his clients and the correct guidance given, made him without doubt an excellent counsellor. Many people benefits from his advice to lead peaceful lives and were grateful to this noble man! Thought he was not in the best of health he travelled all alone to the National Seminary, Ampitiya to impart his knowledge and experience to aspirants for priesthood. The devotion he had towards the Blessed Virgin Mary made him to be a strong instrument in promoting devotion to Mother Mary. The legionaries rallied round in numbers to pay their last respect to him during the final hours of his last journey. The books authored by him on family counselling and on other psychological topics will always be a beacon to guide both the young and the old to good and profitable lives pleasing to Jesus! Mr. Mendis was a loving father to his children and amply fulfilled his duties towards them. He was a model of love and holiness in action and a shining example to all of us! May the sod lie gently over you Mr.Mendis, and may hosts of singing angles take you to your maker.
The death of Mr.Godwin Mendis , Director of the Family Studies & Services Institute (FSSI) has removed from the counselling scene its foremost practitioner. Quiet and unassuming as he was, Mr. Mendis made his impact felt through his deep understanding of human nature, his sincerity and his genuine concern for people. He was also a most effective communicator. He had a gift for speaking simply and naturally and directly to the point.
I was privileged to be with him on two separate and very different occasions when I marvelled at the way his audience spontaneously warmed to him. I’ve no doubt it was because his genuineness shone through his words. Once, we were on the same platform in kandy when he addressed a gathering of doctors and medicals personnel who formed the Sri Lanka Association for Voluntary Surgical Contraception, on what constituted counselling in that particular context. As he spoke, out of his considerable knowledge and experience, I could see how his highly educated audience responded to him. It was no wonder they asked for his services again and again.
The other occasion, in marked contrast, was in the Free Trade Zone when at the instance of the Seva Vanitha Movements, a large group of girls working in different factories there, was assembled for a series of talks by a panel of counsellors. Mr. Mendis had been asked to speak on the theme of “Girl Meets Boy” and how well he did so! There was humour, understanding and valuable insights in a talk delivered in a most friendly manner and no one could fail to see the instant rapport that was built between him and his audience of young women. Making people feel at home, establishing confidence and trust, was a gift he had.
Other tribute to him have been published by fellow Roman Catholics who bore testimony to his worth as a dedicated churchman. I only knew Godwin outside that sphere and while I am aware that his involvement with his faith was central to his life and work, I can also testify that his concern for troubled people transcended any boundaries of religion or race. When some of us went to Welisarsa to pay our respect on the morning of his funeral, there was a Buddhist lady with us who had lost her husband under tragic circumstance a few years ago. She spoke from her heart as she told us how much he had helped her to cope with her grief.
A Muslim friend also made the journey to Welisara and she paid her tribute to the man who had a big hand in her training and for whom she had such respect and admiration that she was always willing to participate in any program at the FSSI when called on by Mr. Mendis.
He was also always accessible and available to us who were connected with other helping agencies, ever willing to be of help when asked. He was ever ready to share his expertise with others. He had trained scores of counselors over the years and his regular training courses held in both Sinhala and English, were much in demands.
Godwin Mendis was counselor par excellence and a fine human being. He made a difference in the lives of many. All of us, who had the good fortune to know him, share the grief of his sorrowing family. He will continue to live our fond memories.
"M
ariya Sevena”, Welisara, Ragama, ardent Legionery of Mary, Patishiner of Nagoda, Kandana, family Counselor Par Excellence, beloved of God, beloved of his family and friends, who passed into Glory on 7th March 1999.
I am home in heaven dear ones;
Oh! So happy and so bright!
There is perfect joy and beauty
In this everlasting light.
All the pain and grief is over,
Every restless tossing passed
I am now at peace forever,
Safely home in Heaven at last.
Did you wonder I so calmly
Trod the valley of the Shade?
Oh! But Jesus! Love illumined
Every dark and fearful glade.
And He came Himself to meet me
In that way so hard to tread;
And with Jesus “arm to lean on,
Could I have one doubt or dread?
Then you must not grieve so sorely,
For I love you dearly still;
Try to look beyond earth’s shadows
Pray to Trust our Father’s Will
There is work still waiting for you,
So you must not idly stand;
Do it now, while life remained
You shall rest in Jesus Land.
When that work is all completed,
He will gently call you Home;
Oh! The rapture of that meeting,
Oh! The joy to see you come!
……Selected……..
Having known and worked closely with Mr. Mendis for nearly 30 years I can say that he was one of the most remarkable men I have met in my life. I am very fortunate that he took to the Marriage and Family Apostolate like a duck taking to water. Though I was convinced that this Apostolate should be in the hands of married lay people, when I launched the Family Services Institute (the original name) to provide services of education and enrichment of marriage and family life, I was hard put to it to find lay persons competent to undertake those tasks. Then serendipitously Mr. Mendis appeared. Perhaps it was his long association with the Legion of Mary that inspired him to take to this Apostolate. He was in the first batch of participants in the Counselor Training Programme I launched in 1973. He also followed the other Courses I taught at FSI such as the one on the Life Cycle of the human person. Besides, on his own he looked for and found opportunities to educate himself in the line of his chosen field of service viz. Marriage, Family and Family Counseling. He was a great self-learner. Mr. Mendis went so far as to take Pre-mature retirement from Govt. service (in the Draughtman’s Dept) to join FSI as my Assistant. As such, and because of affiliations of the Institute with foreign Organisations, I was able to give him opportunities to participate in Conferences and engage in advanced training programmes abroad. He made the best use of those chances to grow in knowledge and competence.
In the early eightees. After I started SUBODHI, the Institute of Integral Education, at Piliyandala. I did not have much time to devote to FSI. Fortunately Mr. Mendis was there to shoulder my work load too; so it was only logical for me to appoint Mr. Mendis as the CEO of the Institute in the course of time. I could not have found a more dedicated and competent person. With a little support from me from behind, he really took the Institute forward reaching out to a wider, largely non Christian, clientele, which exactly what I had in mind when I started the Institute. He spared no pains to offer the training programmes of FSI to numerous Organisation such as the Prisons Dept., Child Probation Dept., Acoholics Anonymous, Save the Children, Sumithrayo, Sarvodaya, Forut, Lions Club, Rotary, Zonta etc. etc. He really put the Institute in the social services map of Sri Lanka. All this besides responding to many demands on him for personal counseling.
With regard to Mr. Mendis’ quality and characher as a husband and father I can do no better than quote at length what one of his sons, Franklyn, has written about him.
‘Dad was such a loving and caring father to seven of us, two boys and five girls, and a faithful and responsible husband to our mother who always totally depended on him for everything. As a person who strongly believed in God, Dad guided us spiritually from our small days, not by advice but by example. He showed us that nothing can be done without God’s blessings, as well as that nothing will go wrong if we have faith in God… Other than fulfilling his responsibilities, duties and obligations to our family, Dad’s next wish and will was to always help others. Dad used to say that he got his initial formation to help others when he joined the Legion of Mary as a junior member at De Mazenod College. After holding many positions at parish, regional and district levels (in the Legion of Mary) he was at the helm of the national body, the National President ( Senatus of Sri Lanka), at a very young age and held this position for three terms, unanimously elected by the members. Among the many projects implemented at national level, there were two outstanding ones. One is the founding of “Maw Sevana” a Home for destitute children at Mattakkuliya: that had been one of his childhood dreams… the other was the setting up of a model housing village in a very poor area in Ragama, called “Magulpokuna….” Dad managed to get the support of many quarters and finally completed the village with 144 new houses with all basic facilities, a junior school and health centre. Incidentally this was the first model village set up in the country… There was one common thing said about Dad by all who came to pay their last respects to him when he died. They all said that dad was definitely one-in-a-million to be born in this country, with such a sense of love for people, and commitment and dedication to make others happy. That is very true, not merely because he is my father but because he was really chosen by God to serve his people in his name”.
I consider it a privilege to write a few words to honor the memory of late Mr. Godwin Mendis. Though I had known his it was as the coordinator of Family Apostolate in the Archdiocese of Colombo that I came to know more about him.
I remember him to be a: Man of God:
He had been in the Catholic Association called Legion of Mary ever since his youth. He attended its weekly meetings faithfully and did his portion of work he was assigned with. This he did for many years in his own village Nagoda (Next to Ragama)
For years he was a regular Sunday worshipper with his wife. And I know in spite of his heart condition he used to walk down from Paul VI Centre to St. Philip Neri Church, Pettah for morning Mass. I used to see him recite the Rosary and his faith would have been simple but deep, I guessed he never argued on religion.
Man of simple way:
I found late Mr. Godwin Mendis quite simple in his ways. Boasting about oneself or boasting one’s image had no place in his life. He responded to everyone. Once he told me that at times he watched television with his grandchildren and that he answered when they asked questioned. I have heard that he organized the weddings of all his children without serving liquor. On one occasion he told me that the Sunday after his wedding he learnt to fall in line of “obey” his wife by keeping the holy missal in a particular place and not everywhere or anywhere. Simplicity almost touching on humility.
Self-made man:
Mr. Godwin Mendis was the executive director of Family Studies and Services Centre, Colombo 11. But to my knowledge he had no degrees to his credit. However hi knew what many degrees would have given him knowledge wise. He was a student till the end. He grasped many concepts, ideas and knew well how to link all that to day to day reality. Being a lover of books he read whatever was helpful to him. He could address any audience on topics related to his field.
Man of service:
The sense of service was in his blood. He would help anyone coming his way. His diary carried many appointments; whether he should have taken more rest and lived longer is a matter between him and his God. The same would have been with his availability for members of his family. He was ready for many sacrifices.
Often he worked with discomfort without complaining. He was blessed with a deep desire as well as a capacity to work. The files in the office would be a witness to all what he did.
Great listener
At her funeral, one of his daughters told me that her father was a very kind person. She said if every one of the children wanted to speak to him, he would then and there pull a chair and talk with him/her. He listened to many people from different walks of life. Mr. Mendis found not only time but he always had a great desire to do so.
Once the life at Paul VI Centre stopped and it took 45 minutes to repair it. As he could not climb the stairs he waited down stairs seated in a chair. A man found him and started talking to him. Godwin said it turned out to be very fruitful counseling session.
Whenever I wanted to talk to him he always made me feel at ease and asked me to sit down and he would listen. As I finish putting a few memories of Godwin in to shape I have to confess that soon after his death I wished that memory may take up his cause for sainthood. I believe he is a saint.
From the time I remember Dad (we fondly called him "Thaththa" then) he was an active member of the Legion Of Mary. He was very busy with the Legion work and therefore, often he came home late in the evenings and on most of the weekends & holidays, he was not at home. That time, he was working at Posts & Telecommunications Dept. as Head of Drawing Office.
I had been only 3 years when Dad attended the 2nd Vatican Council Conference in Rome and also, visited Mr. Frank Duff, the Founder of the Legion Of Mary in Dublin, Ireland in 1967. Apparently, he was out for about 3 weeks and when he returned to Sri Lanka, I had not recognized him and was looking out and not willing to even smile with him. Dad used to say that he was very sad and it took couple of days for me to start looking at him and gradually to smile and then talk with him.
I never went to sleep till Dad returned home late in the evening. Be it 9,10 or 11 p.m. I waited till he came home, although most of my elder sisters and brother was a sleep by then (I was the 5th child and youngest at that time). Life was very different then and people go to sleep very early. When Dad comes home, I sit on his lap till he has his dinner while talking to Amma and sometimes Mamma as well (our Grand Mother).
When I was +5 years or so, Dad used to come home after work and then go out again for Legion work with other Legionaries as well. For Presedium meetings, meetings on Maghul Pokuna Housing project, fund raising activities and Nagoda Parish activities. I started going with him on these journeys. I have walked enough and more times to Maghul Pokuna with Dad and his colleagues for meetings, cleaning & shramadana work and until the Project was completed with more than 140 houses. There were no street lamps on those roads and it was pitch dark most of the areas and the roads were narrow and under developed. When we return, it is past mid night in most instances. There are weekends and holidays, where the whole day has been spent on these projects and different assignments. Very often, I too was a part of Dad's entourage. Most of the time, I am the only kid and I just have to hang around for hours and hours with the elders, although it never stopped me going with Dad. Regularly, 6-10 Legionaries come home in the evening to discuss and plan these projects & assignments. Once again, I am around Dad. I won't leave the front verandah until they leave whatever the time is.
There was a time that Dad was traveling in the Chillaw Diocese so frequently on Legion work, during late 1960's to early 1970's. I think it was mostly to attend Curia meetings, promotion of Legion across the Diocese, Retreats, lectures on human psychology/leadership, promotion of "Maria Handa" magazine, etc. Many evenings and almost all weekends and holidays, Dad travelled to Negombo, Kochchikade, Waikkal, Thoppuwa, Palangathurei, Kimbulapitiya, Madampe, Chillaw, katuneriya, Wennappuwa for these assignments. There are times he travelled with Fr. Ignatious Gamlath who was a very frequent visitor to our place. At times, different Legionaries from Senatus and at times Legionaries from Nagoda Parish joined Dad in these assignments. I would have been about +6 years during this time. I travelled with Dad in these excursions very frequently, whether he went alone or with an entourage. Aiya (Rohitha) and Edel Akka who were 3 years and 2 years elder to me respectively also, joined some of these excursions. I was very happy whenever they joined, because I had some company. Otherwise I used to be the only kid and had to hang around for hours by myself. At Kochchikade town, just before the bridge on right hand side, there was a Hotel and that is where we stop for Tea and snacks/sweets, every time we go that way. We were regular visitors to that Hotel and as kids, we used to wait till we stop there. Legion had a Morris Minor wagon and later-on an Austin Commer van and Dad travelled mostly in these vehicles.
When Maw Sevana (home for destitute boys) at Mattakkuliya was being built, I have gone with Dad to the site very often from even before the Ground Breaking ceremony and till the Opening ceremony. After it was opened, I have once again gone there with Dad very regularly for meetings which were held there by the Board of Management, mostly on weekends and holidays.
Travelling to Kegalle monthly for the Curia meeting with Dad, was another regular event of my calendar at one time. It was always on a Saturday or Sunday morning and mostly Dad travelled by bus and I went along with him. We leave home very early to go to Pettah and get a Kandy bus and reach Kegalle by around 9 a.m. and the meeting goes on for about 3 hours at the Church premises which is on a hill top, just before the town. I hang around all by myself till Dad finish the meeting. Thereafter, we walk up to the town and have lunch at a Restaurant (operated by Chinese people) which was the standard place to have lunch and then take a bus back to Colombo and take another bus to Welisara where we live.
There were so many other places Dad travelled across Sri Lanka for Legion work and for lectures on different topics and I have gone thousands times along with him to, Moratuwa, Kalutara, Payagala, Beruwela, Kandy, Galle, Polonnaruwa, Kurunegala and so many cities, towns and villages. Even from the Posts & Telecommunications Dept, Dad travelled a lot to give lectures all over the country. Once when he went to Nuwara Eliya with 2 other uncles (Uncle Michael Liyanage and Uncle Edward) on lectures, Dad took the whole family and we stayed at the Circuit Bungalow for few days. Another time, the same team went to Galle for lectures and Aiya(Rohitha), Edel Akka and I went with Dad and stayed for 2 days at a Hotel close to Galle Church. When Dad and them were at lectures, one of the uncles from Postal Dept, Galle, came to see us and gave us few very big Guava's which we had never seen at that time (now they are freely available). Though we were really tempted to eat those, we decided to keep it and take it home to share with other sisters. But, when Dad returned after the lectures, his colleagues came to our room to see us. They saw the Guava's on the table and two of them ate those. What a pity, we were so sad and angry with them. We could neither eat nor take it home.
One day Dad went to Good Shepherded Convent, Kotahena for some lecture on a holiday, in an afternoon. As usual, I joined him and we went by bus and I would have been about 9 years by then. It was raining right through and I was at the back of a large hall where he gave the lecture. Dad kept an umbrella with me and I was standing near a door of that hall. A man came up to me and asked for the umbrella and promised to return it soon. So, I gave it to him and waited and waited for him, but he never returned. I was afraid and thought Dad will scold me. After the lecture, Dad came to me and asked where is the umbrella. So, I told him what happened and he smiled. Of course, we got wet when we came back home in the rain without an umbrella.
With all these work, Dad did everything possible to look after the family well. His priorities were, giving nutritious food for us (there wasn't a single day without ample, milk, eggs, butter, meat, vegies), keeping us healthy (anytime rush us to the Doctor, even if we get a cold), giving the best possible education (taught us any subjects at home, helped in our homework & assignments, made time tables for us to study even during school vacations) and inculcating religious values (we said the Rosary daily with the Catena, if Dad was at home or not). Every year he take us to Madhu church for couple of days during school vacation (most of the time we went together with our Aunt's family) and at least one more trip during another school vacation to places like, Up country, Kandy, Galle, Trincomalee, Jaffna, Anuradhapura and always tried to give us a novel experience. We went to Jaffna for 5-6 days and on our way there, Dad gave his spectacles to me to keep for few minutes. I was putting my head and hands out of the train window and suddenly dropped the spectacles out of the fast moving train. I really thought Dad will scold me, but he only said to be careful next time. We flew back from Kankasanthurei Airport to Rathmalana Airport by Air Ceylon plane.
In his lectures, training programs and workshops, Dad often gave examples of real life, his own experiences with our family. So, obviously we became the stories & tales he related at these numerous programs. He often mentioned things about me and what I have said and done as a kid. Things like how I asked "who ate the apple" one day when he related the Isac Newton's theory of gravitation to us. Dad used to tell lot of stories about all of us, including about Amma as examples. Since I go along with him for most of these programs, people ask me "so you are the second son who said this...and that.." People used to ask this type of things from all of us and from Amma as well. We were very shy when they ask about those examples and Amma used to get angry with Dad and scold him. All he did was just smiling, and Amma used to get more mad with him. Still, he will smile...or laugh. Amma had sacrificed a lot by letting Dad to do social service, which was his passion. If not for Amma's understanding and support, Dad would have not been able to do so much of social service. Amma took lot of family responsibilities to help Dad with his work. Dad knew that and always appreciated Amma's understanding and support.
When I was about +14 years, Somewhere in 1978, Dad pre-maturely retired from the Posts & Telecommunications Dept to take up full time work at Family Studies & Services Institute (FSSI). Almost the same time, Dad suffered first and second Heart Attacks within a short span, when he was about 48 years. I remember how bad he was after the second attack which was actually a heart failure. He took couple of months to gradually recover before he started work at FSSI. I think Dad's social service took a different turn from that time. He couldn't do much work with the Legion due to his new, full time responsibilities and commitments at FSSI. So, eventually he reduced his involvement with the Legion (I don't think he had a choice). But I believe by then, he has groomed lot of other capable Legionaries to take up those responsibilities of the Legion and carry on the work. Yet, Dad remained a Legionary and always supported the cause and work of the Legion Of Mary.
With FSSI, Dad's role became much more in to, scientific counseling, conducting; counselor training programs, child education programs, youth education programs, life education programs, marriage education programs, etc. It was more and more lectures and training of thousands and thousands of people from different walks of life. There were no boundaries for his work, he worked with all religions, all races, all schools, all governmental and non-governmental organizations and travelled all over the country very regularly. Some of them were one-off programs and others were regular short term, medium term and long term programs. I never gave up going with Dad for these programs, although I had come to an age to concentrate on my studies. Whenever I found the time, I went with Dad wherever he went. During school vacations and holidays, I travelled with Dad although I couldn't go with him frequently for evening programs like I did when I was small. Once FSSI organized a 3-4 days International Conference at Sri Lanka Foundation Institute and I managed to go and help him there. I was very proud when Dad thanked me during his Vote of Thanks. When I did my G.C.E.(O/L) exam, there was a gap of few months without school, waiting for results. I took the chance and travelled with Dad everywhere he went. By this time I could understand things and therefore, I listened to his lectures most of the time from the back of those lecture halls (wherever it was permitted). From my small days to this time, there was something in common I have noticed about Dad. He always prepared very well for the lectures and had small notes which he would refer while travelling and use it wherever necessary during the lectures as well. Those were his famous "Lecture Notes" as he called it and took along with him in a pouch. He never missed it. We were so used to it and at least one of us will ask him "Dad did you take your Lecture Notes" when he leaves home for programs.
Dad wanted to paint the interior of FSSI and I volunteered to help him with my friends from the Nagoda Legion, during a school vacation. All of us were about +16 years at that time. We got Dad to buy the paint and other material and about 6 of us went to FSSI for 5-6 days and painted the whole office and painted/polished the furniture as well. I cut my hand to a ceiling fan that was running, while I was painting and had heavy bleeding with a deep and long cut. I still have the scar on my left wrist.
Another time, Dad wanted to paint the Maw Sevana (home for destitute boys) and found some people to sponsor the paint and other material. We the Legionaries from Nagoda, this time about 10-12 of us went there for couple days during school vacation and painted all the buildings and furniture.
Once Dad was conducting a 2 weeks Psychology training program at Police Training School in Kalutara. A Police car came to pick him and drop him back at home daily. Nimmi Akka, Edel Akka and I travelled with him to school in that car because he left home very early. One morning, there was an accident at Wattala and there was an injured person lying on the road. Dad told the Police driver to stop the car and wanted to help the injured. So, he told us to get off the car and gave us money to go by bus from there to school and he took the injured person to hospital. We were so angry with Dad for leaving us high and dry on the road and three of us came back home by bus, without going to school.
As I became 18 years, I got my driving license. This gave me much more opportunities to travel with Dad on his assignments all over the country. Whenever his driver was not available (which was frequent), I helped Dad to get about with his programs during evenings, weekends, holidays and school vacations. Once, Dad conducted a 3 day residential Retreat at Kuliyapitiya Church. I drove him there, left the car there and came home in a bus. Three days later, I took a bus back to Kuliyapitiya and drove Dad back home. Another time, Dad was conducting a Counselor Training Course at Good Shepherd Convent in Wennappuwa, thrice a week from 2-6 p.m. over a period of 3-4 months. I was after my A/L exam and Dad did not have a driver at that time. I drove him regularly for that program and had to hang around there, for four hours each day until he finished the Training. That type of specific programs, I couldn't even sit at the back and listen to him either. Always I drove him carefully at a constant average speed, because of Dad's health (heart condition) and for him to run through his Lecture Notes, preparing for the programs.
Even after I left school and started working, I used to help Dad to get about whenever a driver was not around. There were regular times I drove him to office (FSSI) in the morning by 7.45 (everyday Dad went for 8 a.m. Mass at Philip Neris Church) and then go back there in the evening after work and drive him back home. After I got married and when I got my own car also, I still continued to drive him around whenever he needed help and I was fortunate to live in the same compound, although in a separate house. One day when I was returning home after work, Dad was standing on the road trying to catch a bus to go to Seeduwa Church where he had to preach the sermon during the Novena leading to Church Feast. His driver was sick and he was late. Straightaway, I quickly drove him to Seeduwa, waited till he delivered the sermon and brought him back home.
One day in an evening, Dad asked me if I could give a lift to him the next day to office, because his driver had taken leave. I said okay and just asked him "why your driver is enjoying so much leave". He smiled and went home. Next morning I got ready to leave and looked for Dad, but he was not around. Then Amma said that Dad went early by bus and to tell me that, he doesn't need children to tell him how to manage his staff. I was so upset and sad and when I contacted him, he was already in office. I apologized and said that I didn't really mean anything and that I will bring him back home in the evening. He agreed and I was relieved.
Another time, Dad had to conduct a 3 day residential Retreat for all the Priests of the Badulla Diocese at Badulla Retreat House. His driver was not available and he was wondering how to go. I took leave from my office and drove him there with my family. My elder son, Chryshane was just 2 years at that time and we were given a small bungalow within the same premises, to stay for the three days.
Similarly, I have driven Dad to hundreds and hundreds of programs all over the country, from the time I got my driving license. Ampitiya Seminary, Maggona, Galle, Balangoda, Rathnapura, Yatiyantota, Kurunegala, Thalawila, Hettipola, Negombo , Periyamulla, Chillaw, Marawila, Gampaha, Kandy and Colombo & it's suburb's, have been frequent places where I have driven Dad, until he left us for good in 1999. On his last day, Saturday 6th March, Dad had one program somewhere in Colombo and conducted the Counselor Training Course at FSSI in the afternoon. After the program, Dad came to Mabole Church for the 5.30 p.m. Mass (for Sunday) and sent the driver off from there, because I had gone with my family for the same Mass. So, after the Mass I drove Dad home by about 6.45 p.m. not knowing that it was to be the last time, I would ever get an opportunity to drive him for his work.
Next day we were woken up by Amma's crying for help around 5.30 in the morning. Dad had got a stroke and fallen on the floor. It took a while before we drove him to hospital, because he told us not to move him immediately and we were trying to get a Doctor to come home and to get an ambulance. He lost his vision and could only say a few words. We drove Dad to National Hospital and on the way at Maradana, he said "how is Amma and Baby (referring to youngest sister, Shehara) I can't breathe" and we said " they are okay Dad, don't worry we are closer to hospital" and then he said "God Bless". I didn't know anything and I couldn't think anything, I was just holding him from the back seat right along while Aiya (Rohitha) was driving. We reached the hospital in few minutes and on admission, they said "sorry"... we have lost him. I couldn't believe it...and it was so sad and pathetic. I felt as if I lost the whole world...
Having Dad was the happiest thing in my life and losing Dad was the saddest thing in my life.
I’m 25 years now & looking back 15 years, I can tell most of the years that I have passed along the way are a blur & that I cannot remember much about “Dada”, but the little I do is more than enough for me to last a life time..
Mr. Godwin Mendis! That was how he was known for the entire world: A great man with a lot of patience, a great leader with extraordinary leadership qualities, a great family counselor with many more achievements & a lot of wisdom. But for us here at home this great man was simply known as ‘Dad’ or ‘Dada’.
I being his 3rd grand daughter only had the privilege of knowing him for 10 delicate years of my life. I was 10 when he left us all forever & the empty space he left in my little heart was never filled ever again.
As a 10 year old I have always heard my parents, aunts, uncles and many outsiders speak very highly of him & about the outstanding work he once did for our society, especially our catholic society. But sadly I was way too young to understand all the wondrous work Dada did to the world. However I can remember the little things he did & used to do for all of his grandchildren.
His nick name for me was ‘ Seeni Kate’. I can still close my eyes and picture him calling me that, with a loving smile on his face. I could also tell you that Dada’s favorite food item would most definitely have something to do with sugar or sweet. The countless times he would say to Achcha “ Berney I will go & close the back door & come ” & I have caught him standing near the fridge with his hand inside the jam bottle.. He would give me a very mischievous smile & say “ I’m just tasting it putha..!”
Friday evenings used to be a treat for us, because after work Dada would bring a bag full of sugary and baked goods. In that bag one could find sugar buns, crocodile buns (with extra sugar), hot cross buns, jam tarts, seeni batto, boondhi & muscat. What dada enjoyed the most was to make sure that he has a bite from each and every bun he gave us while replying to Achchca’s stare with a simple statement “my little daughties and puthas will get hurt, if I don’t have a bite form each of their buns”.
He had a basin near the well where it was elevated to a certain level which he would fill water & have a wash. I never understood why that basin was kept on top of a concrete wall. As a little girl I used to wonder why dada simply couldn’t bend & wash his face like all of usually does. Not until I was about 15 I realized that he had a severe enlarge heart condition where he could not bend even to wash his own face.
Also Dada was famous to carry a brown paper envelope in his front top pocket & in that envelope was all the money he carried in the world. I remember my own father once commenting on it saying “Dad that is a magic envelope because it never runs out of money” in reply Dad merely smiled.
When we used to watch TV & the mosquitos would bite us & us being kids would complain loudly saying that “we can’t stay here” or “ its itching too much” , I clearly remember Dada would walk in to their bedroom & bring a few of Achcha’s sarees and cover us up and lite a coil and keep it underneath our feet. But he would always stay close by and keep a watch full eye on us because we fidget too much and he was very afraid that the sarees would catch fire and burn us from the coil he lit for us.
Dad was known as a walking encyclopedia of his time & honestly I would agree with that 100% with all the modern technologies we have today, we can easily access any information with just a button or a click away. But 15 years ago, where internet was not even heard of much in Sri Lanka our Dad knew everything & I mean everything! May it be about a foreign country & its politics, may it be about a geographical location of a place, architecture, agriculture, philosophy, human resource or even a verse from the Bible, you name it Dad knew it all!
My elder brother & I have often spoken among us about the loss we have without Dad in our life now, because back then we were way too young to understand his great work and to learn anything from him. If he was with us today we all could have gained a vast knowledge in many subjects.
When I started to write today, I didn’t think I would be able to at least string 5 sentences together, but as I started to jog down my memory lane I realized how much I have kept in store in my memory & how well my memories of my most favorite person was well preserved.
Dada your last words to me were “my little seeni kate go and show your colours and make me proud and bring the cup home..”
Sadly when I actually won the best all-rounder, best performance athlete of the year trophy in my school sports meet in 1999 just 5 days after you passed away I did bring the cup home like you wanted me to but you were no more with us for me to show it to you. But I know that no matter where you are & I’m pretty sure that you are in Heaven with Jesus looking and smiling down at us even today and guiding us so that we will be making and taking the right decisions and choices.
We love you Dad and we Miss you.
Though I had heard of him as a Legionary I came to know the late Mr. Godwin Mendis only in the latter part of year 1980 when I was elected for the first time as the President of the Senatus of Sri Lanka. By then Godwin was a colossus in the lay apostolate arena in Sri Lanka. In the Legion of Mary he was a Past President of the Senatus and the then incumbent Chairman of the Board of Management of Maw Sevana, the Home for Destitute Boys. I found Godwin to be a mild-mannered, soft spoken person with a ready smile lighting up his countenance. I have had the opportunity of travelling with him on several occasions on Legion missions and found him to be a good travelling companion. On such travels we used to discuss about our own families and felt much at ease with one another. My family was younger than his. Nevertheless both had young and growing children. I found him to be very much a ‘family man’.
At the time he was in demand by the Legion councils to address them. One such I distinctly remember was the Acies Function of Kegalle Curia held in St. Mary’s Church. He was the invited speaker. I accompanied him as Senatus president. I was edified by his presentation. “Godwin Sahodaraya” was a name among the legionaries, particularly in the Sinhala stream. I found that he had quite a tolerant nature and once while travelling together asked him whether he ever gets angry. He smiled. Though he always carried his pills in a small vial he never considered his heart ailment a predicament to live a full life.
As a Counselor he was much sought after. On many occasions I walked into his room at the 6th floor of Paul VI Centre when he was the Director of Family Studies and Services Institute, just to have a chat. It was a treat. As a person younger to him both in age and legion service I looked up to him with respect. His audience as a counselor was made of teachers, professionals, religious and even priests. Many sought his advice and they were both young and old.
A land-mark in his apostolate as a legionary was when he embarked on a far reaching plan to start a Legion Home for Destitute Boys. Legion of Mary was never a resourceful organization monetarily. Its resources are spiritual. Godwin based his plan on this spiritual resource and placing his trust on our Lord’s mercy he launched the Maw Sevana project 40 years back with few other pioneers such as the late Messes Maurice Lord and Roy Wijayagoonewardena among them. This meritorious deed has helped to develop the lives of many young men in the last forty years. Faith of such pioneers has hitherto sustained ‘Maw Sevana’ even with difficulties. It is laudable to see the children of such visionaries moving in to sustain the Home. The recent major repairs carried out to the buildings of Maw Sevana by Mr. Rohitha Mendis as a CSR project of his firm is much appreciated by the Senatus of Sri Lanka.The mortal body of a man may perish, but his good deeds run immortal as his soul. As the family of Godwin Mendis celebrates his life and work in commemorating his 15th Death Anniversary on 7th March, I consider it a privilege to have penned these few lines in memory of a great Soldier of Mary.
We still miss him! I often wish he was still with us. Persons of the calibre of Godwin Mendis are so hard to find.
My association with Godwin Mendis was on account of his counseling skills. I knew he was a great Legionary too but they were always “problems or concerns” that led me to him. In my pastoral work as a Religious Sisters many persons have shared their joys and hopes, their griefs and anxieties with me. And there were times I realized I must direct them to specialized persons for necessary guidance and help. It was invariably Godwin Mendis that I thought of. He was always available at Paul VI Institute whenever I called on his services. Persons with marriage problems, young ones with suicidal tendencies, family feuds, depressed persons and all others we were not competent to help were referred to him for expert guidance. I have never heard even one of them speak badly of Godwin Mendis after any encounter with him. He was so calm and patient and kind. I believe he was all this and more to so many because he was also so God-centred.
Many memories come back… Once he was invited to our Mother House in Negombo for a talk. The audience was all sisters. He held centre-stage so humbly and shared his vast knowledge with simple dignity that he was a great inspiration to all present. It was good for us to look up to and learn from a layman. On another occasion he came to our convent in Rajagiriya and I still remember the container of his heart drugs he laid on the chair as he arose to speak. No sickness stood as a barrier for him to be of service to others, to continue his God-given mission of sharing his knowledge and expertise. I recall meeting him on that stairway of Paul VI climbing to the floor on which he worked, as the elevator was out of order. He was a heart patient who never thought of himself but reached out to any other in loving service. An incredible apostle of the Lord! He truly had received a Mission, as it were from God, and he remained a faithful and profitable servant. Well done good and faithful servant!
I have the highest regard for Godwin Mendis and believe he was a unique, rare lay-missionary who did so much for people in need. To hurting people he brought healing and solace, to the troubled of heart peace and understanding, to those with problems the ability to find their own inner solutions and those without faith their centre in God again. Such men are rare and I consider myself fortunate to have known him in my life. He has not only been a GIFT but also a GRACE.
It is indeed a pleasant task to reminisce and write about my experience of "Mr.mendis", (as I always called him) on the 15th anniversary of his death. I am indeed grateful to his family for asking me to write a few lines about him for the occasion, as it gave me an opportunity to go back to those precious memories.
Godwin was a person I knew, and experienced for a long time, beginning from the days I worked at Family Studies and Services Institute and until his death. In fact, I spoke with him just two days before his death. He was not doing well and he told me that the doctors told him that his heart was not working even half of its capacity. But then, he was going for a workshop somewhere on that day too!
Godwin was the Director of the FSSI, and I was a staff member. I was young and had just come back after my studies and was very much new to the work. His guidance and his understanding was great at all times. I learned many things from him. Most of all, his approach to people and difficulties in life was admirable.
Two things that touched me most about his life were, his deep Christian faith and an abiding love for Christ, and flowing from that, his commitment to help anyone who was in distress. He had a great capacity to make and continue relationships. It is not an exaggeration if I say that anyone who came in contact with him whether listening to his lectures, or encountering him individually, went away deeply touched by his genuineness and kindness. He gave hope to many who had lost meaning in life. There must be hundreds over there who will bear testimony to the fact that he touched their lives and gave hope to their lives .
Knowing the caliber of Godwin, our dear Fr. Mervyn must have 'tempted' him to leave his job and join FSSI, which I am sure he did, with great joy. He loved FSSI with his whole heart and gave himself fully its work. It was a mission undertaken with great zeal and not just work. Many were the engagements; counseling, programmes of various kinds, lectures, training etc,etc, and he would not refuse any request that came to FSSI to impart knowledge or for help and healing. Though he never verbalized them, he must have made many sacrifices in order to deal with his big load of work.
He was an excellent counselor and trainer where he imparted not only his knowledge and skills, but his own personal qualities of gentleness, respect, unconditional positive regard, etc.He was a true Rogerian follower in his profession. His sense of ethics was remarkable-- always do the right thing.
Just as he loved his work, he also loved his family dearly. It was not that easy for him to balance these two areas of his life. But he did it well and according to my experience he never shirked his responsibilities towards his family. He was a loving husband to Bernie and a caring father to his children. Even though he experienced health problems for a long time and being in the hospital a couple of times with a severe heart condition, he never made that a reason to slow or cut down his work. Something that I noticed and appreciated much was that he took care of himself and did not take unnecessary risks .His tiny medicine bottle was always by his side. Even now I can visualize it on his table! When the elevator to the 6th floor of Paul the sixth Building was out of order, he worked on the first floor. There was always a way to cope with difficulties. It was not that easy, but he never complained.
Then the day came. It was time for his Master to call him home. "Well done, good and faithful servant. Inherit the kingdom prepared for you. You have completed your mission". This must have been God's welcome words to him, when he reached the portals of heaven. I have no doubt that he must be looking down on us as he enjoys life in the bosom of our loving God. I consider it a blessing that I was privileged to be closely associated with him and be touched by his life in many ways.
Thank you Godwin for what you have been to all of us. May you rest in peace.
T he picture I carry of Godwin in my mind’s eye is of a kind face, a calm expression and a courteous manner. I imagine that Fr. Mervyn would have been more than pleased when he handed the reins to Godwin as Director of the Family Studies & Services Institute (FSSI), Sri Lanka’s first Counselling Centre which he founded way back in 1974. Godwin’s able handling of the FSSI more than justified Fr. Mervyn’s complete confidence in him.
It also enabled Fr. Mervyn to give his full attention to another cherished project that eventually took concrete shape as the beautifully laid out and well-used Institute of Integral Education in Piliyandala.
I can’t claim to have been a close associate of Godwin’s, but as a fellow- counsellor myself, a founder-member of the NCC Counselling Centre established in 1975, I had contact and sometimes interaction with him. He was always ready and willing to join hands with, and give encouragement to, other agencies in this field and to share his own experience with us. One particular memory I have relates to his serenity which couldn’t easily be disturbed. It was a joint meeting held at the auditorium of the National YWCA and chaired by Godwin.
After one presentation, discussion became rather heated and tempers seemed about to flare, when Godwin quietly took charge and with a few well-chosen words poured oil on troubled waters and restored order and calm. His wasn’t a flamboyant personality, yet there was about him an air of quiet dignity and inner strength that compelled respect. Godwin Mendis was a devoted family man, a trustworthy friend, a wise counsellor and – to sum up simply – a GOOD AND GREAT HUMAN BEING. I have no doubt that all the trumpets sounded on the other side for a man such as he.
I was only 5 years old when my Grand Father (I called him Dad, because my father called him Dad) left this world, but my memories of him are still so clear and they have never faded away. My house is right next to my Grandparent’s house, so from the moment I can walk I have been running to their place. I still remember when I was aroun3 years old I had a toy car in which one could sit and move about; and in that I used to race through our side entrance to see Dad and Achcha (my Grand Mother). I used to go there for everything; I recollect running to Dad when my Dadda used to punish me for something wrong I had done (like not eating my vegetables :p). Still remember how Dad used to keep me on his lap and tell me “Rat Stories” (I know it sounds absurd but for a 4 year old it was pretty amusing!) I can still feel that moment sitting on my Grandfather’s lap. I also remember how I used to carry all my animal toys in a big bag and go to play with Dad. Towards the last days when Dad wasn’t well, he still used to sit on the bed and play with me, oh how those memories are still fresh in my mind. But there is one memory that would never ever fade away, that is the whole ordeal on the morning of March the 7th 1999.
We were woken up early in the morning by the shouts of my Grandmother; Dadda and Mamma immediately took me and went to see what was wrong. To see Dad had had a stroke and fallen, I can remember standing in the hall with all my Uncles and Aunties and Neighbours (who had all come by this time) and Dad was made to sit in the chair in front of their room entrance and Dadda and the other Uncles were trying to give his medicines while others were trying to call an Ambulance, this scenario I remember perfectly. I asked my Mamma as to what was wrong with Dad and that I wanted to go to him, but I wasn’t allowed to. Then I recollect Dad being lifted up with the chair and taken to the car to go to the Hospital as no Ambulance could be found. That was the last time I saw him alive. Then I remember Mamma bringing me home and telling me to pray for Dad; after sometime I remember hearing the dread full scream of one of my Aunts from Achcha’s house. The news had come. Dad had departed from this world.
Small though I was, I knew what death meant, that that person is not coming back; I can see flash backs of the funeral very clearly like the massive crowds coming in and out, the weeping, running around the coffin and climbing the plastic chairs with my cousins etc. On the funeral day I still remember Dadda carrying me while I was crying during the funeral procession; I knew I will never see Dad again.
It was many years later when I was older that I came to know who Dad really was, what a Legend he was and it makes me so proud to call him my Grandfather. All the things Dadda tells me about him, all his accomplishments in life just inspire me, his many great characteristics I have seen in my Father too and I want to be just like them. As Grand Son of Godwin Mendis the Great, I’m proud to be a Hiddadura Mendis and I will follow in Dad’s footsteps just like I remember .
M y association with Mr. Godwin Mendis dates back to early Nineteen Eighties. This was the period of my life in which I experienced a deep desire to learn about human bahaviour. About this time, I was fortunate that I met Mr. Mendis at Family Studies and Services Centre and saw in him, a person dedicated to help fellow human beings to resolve a variety of problems in a world that was getting more and more complex. Mr. Mendis had the innate skill to touch the hearts of whoever came to him and thereby to help them to discover the way out of their problems. He did this service in a very humble and sincere approach often disregarding his own comfort and sometimes even his health.
My association with him help me to develop my own value system, dedication and skill to help others irrespective of differences although my skills were not up to the level that I saw in him. He was driven by his spiritual orientation which I believe was influenced by his commitment to the Legion of Mary during the early part of his service to humanity as a true follower of Christ.
In later years, I was involved with Mr. Godwin Mendis in several programmes related to family development at Parish Level and at National Level. In the Public Sector as well as in the Corporate Sector, he was well recognized for his skills in conducting programmes for development of human values and to address human problems. Through my association with Mr. Mendis, I benefited immensely by learning from his approach to address human problems. I am grateful and indebted to Mr. Mendis for the nourishment I received from him Spiritually, Emotionally and by way of observing the fine qualities of his personality.
I had the privilege of meeting Mr.Godwin Mendis way back in early seventies when l got myself enrolled for a counseling course, at Paul VI center where he was one of the facilitators with Rev.Fr. Mervyn Fernando.
If you needed to define who a gentlemen is I vouch Mr. Mendis was one, very rarely found in Soft spoken and very kind hearted he was, that those who followed the course had a great love for him. Those who came to him for counseling went away with a smile for he had some magical solutions.
During his lectures, sometimes he refused to his family. I can never forget the love, respect and admiration with which he spoke about his wife and children. He loved them immensely. That itself was enough to consider him as a successful man.
He believed in the fact that there were no mistakes in life but lessons which will allow one to be better in the future. He said that every problem was a challenge that would enable one to achieve greater results.
He always wore a smile, loved much and won respect of everyone and affection of children. He appreciated beauty and gave himself to leave the world a better place.
The short association I had with him made me a better person.
May God bless his soul.
D ad was a very loving, caring and understanding father to us. He was always ready to listen, and had time for us. He loved my mother deeply and respected her. He was a very loving, caring and understanding husband.
Not only he loved his family, he also loved all the human beings and had a keen interest and love to help people who are in need of help different ways. He was a member, and held different positions, time to time, in many Religious Organisations. Legion of Mary is one of them which he joined at a very young age, and gave new meaning to his life as he had said.
As I grew up I experienced the way he worked to help others. Through these organisations, as well as individually.He helped peoplein numerous ways.
He deeply believed in God, and showed us how to have faith in God. He taught us the spiritual and moral values. With the help of my mother, who gave her full support in every thing he did, he nurtured us well. As a person who is committed to his vocations, while working with the organisations to make other people happy, he full filled his responsibilities as a very loving father, and husband. He always tried to make our home a place filled with love, laughter and happiness.
The times that we spent together with our Dad, were marvellous. Even today 15 years after his death we miss him so badly. And we remember him every single day. I ask God every day to keep my father happy, because he always made us happy.
I would like to end this with the famous quoting:
“ My love for my father has never been touched or approached
by any other love. I hold him in my heart of hearts
as a man apart from all other men, as one apart from
all other beings. “
D ad passed away few months before my ninth birthday. So naturally I don’t remember all my moments with him, especially when I was only a few years old. I have to go by pictures and stories told by my parents and aunts and uncles. All his grandchildren called him “Dad”.
I do remember the last few years before he left us though, my family lived down the lane, just two houses away from my grandparents’ home. Mariya Sevana. Their house was my favourite place. I was very spoiled and stubborn then, and whenever my parents had enough of my nonsense they would scold or tell me enough, I remember would gladly storm off to my grandparents, the people that used to spoil me the most. My grandmother, who makes the best food no matter what she’s making starts cooking the second I walk in. I think a few dishes that dad may have not been allowed due to his health concerns, were permitted during this period because I would insist that he sits and eats with me and starts talking to me. At that age I was filled with too many questions, but he never lost his patience.
He was a walking story book, always so interesting and fascinating. He always had a simple story to tell with a moral behind it. I don’t remember all of them, but most of them were to do with the bible. He knew the bible page for page, and I suppose his talent to speaking to people, he knows exactly how to make it interesting for a child and serious for an adult. These are the things I remember about him, sitting at the front of my grandparents’ house talking for hours, watching him type on his typewriter, something I would get excited about when he would allow me to inspect how it works and type a little myself. Seeing him kneel down at church and thinking to myself, at his age, wouldn’t God understand if he didn’t kneel down.
I remember going to his office building with him, up this very old elevator that used to stop halfway and shake too much and make too many noises. I would be frightened, and he would tell me not to be, and that it would be all ok, and I would believe that fully and immediately calm down. That’s all he had to say “don’t be afraid, it will all be ok”. I never had anything to fear when I was with him. It didn’t matter to me then or even now that he had some illness, he was “superman”. I remember him as unconquerable and whenever I was with him I shouldn’t fear. I suppose he had a look of a man who was strong in the faith of God, and with God why should you fear.
I wish he was with us for longer, there are many time in my life that I could have heard his “don’t be afraid, it will all be ok” to take away my fears. Of course I never knew at that time any of the stuff that my grandfather had done, how many people he had helped. If you probably sat me down and explained it to me I wouldn’t have fully understood at 8 years of age. However I suppose you wouldn’t have needed to, he had this aura about him, I suppose anyone who spent five minutes talking with him would understand what a great man he was. How important he was. Even as a kid, I understood that.
I have been told many times over the years by people I have never met before how great my grandfather was. How kind, how humble how caring. I suppose more than the rest of his grandchildren the boys with his surname feel it the most as we are constantly told what’s expected of us. Sometimes I think to myself what a daunting task, to own up in any way to such a great man and all the good he has done in his lifetime. To have his presence still felt in his work fifteen years after his demise, I have no idea where one would start. I know I would never be able to even remotely compare to such a pious man, but before my time is done I hope I make him proud.
